Relationships

The Story After the Feeling

Grace lives in the space between the feeling and the story.

There is an important distinction between feelings and emotions — though we often use the words interchangeably. We experience a wide range of feelings every day.

Research suggests the physiological surge of a feeling lasts roughly 45 to 90 seconds — unless we continue fueling it with our thoughts.

The initial wave is brief. What extends it is the story we attach to it. It is entirely natural to move from one internal state to another within minutes.

Rapid shifts in feelings are part of normal regulation — not evidence that something is wrong with us.

Imagine this. A colleague says something at work that stings […]

By Doré Frances|2026-02-21T12:10:05-07:00February 21st, 2026|Dore Frances, Relationships, Spirituality, Why Wisdom Is Harder Than You Think|0 Comments

Beneath My Silence – A Poem About Love, Self-Reflection, and Emotional Safety – Series

Over time, I learned that love alone isn’t enough. A relationship needs self-reflection to stay healthy—both people must be willing to look inward, recognize their patterns, and take responsibility for how they show up.

When someone resists that process, the dynamic can become draining and emotionally unsafe. You can’t make another person do the work they’re not ready to face. Letting go of that responsibility is liberating. It allows you to focus on caring for yourself and honoring what you need.

You deserve a relationship where growth is shared, and emotional safety is non-negotiable.

By Doré Frances|2026-02-08T10:44:43-07:00February 8th, 2026|Beneath My Silence - Poems, Dore Frances, Relationships, Series, Why Wisdom Is Harder Than You Think|0 Comments

The Girl Left Behind – Reclaiming My Voice After Childhood Abuse – Series

Yes, I have withdrawn from people, from intimacy, from the world itself. I found safety in small rituals and long hours of familiar television. But I will not let fear decide the shape of my life. I face it with strength forged through survival, grounding myself in what I already know I can withstand.

I am a grown woman now, and I know what monsters are. My childhood was defined by abuse and silence, and my adolescence by betrayal.

Once I went to live with Al and Dotti in Los Altos, my life entered a period of sustained abuse: incest, molestation, parental neglect, severe corporal punishment, and rape.

As a teenager, I was sexually trafficked […]

By Doré Frances|2026-02-08T10:29:11-07:00February 7th, 2026|1161 Covington Road, Aldo Cascinai (Dad), Dore Frances, Relationships, Series, The Girl Left Behind Series, Why Wisdom Is Harder Than You Think|0 Comments

The Girl Left Behind – A Childhood Morning That Changed Everything | A Memoir of Loss – Series

I woke as the sun began to rise, unsettled by the knowledge that my aunt had been heard sobbing and screaming during the night.

I wasn’t panicked—no one wakes expecting to learn that their mother has died.

I noticed my uncle Chuck quietly making phone calls. When I asked if we could call my mom that morning, a flicker of alarm crossed his face. Then the doorbell rang.

My father, our church’s youth pastor, and my Grandpa Bell entered the living room and sat down together, composed and deliberate. George and I were told to stay in the kitchen and finish our breakfast. I had no idea that the moment we were waiting for would […]

By Doré Frances|2026-02-02T12:28:37-07:00February 2nd, 2026|Aldo Cascinai (Dad), Dore Frances, Frances Cascinai (Mom), George A. Cascinai, George Bell (Father of Frances and beloved Grandfather), Relationships, Series, The Girl Left Behind Series, Why Wisdom Is Harder Than You Think|0 Comments

Empaths and Narcissists: Understanding the Attraction and Choosing Healthier Relationships

When Empathy Meets Narcissism: Choosing Yourself Without Losing Your Heart

There is often a powerful—and painful—pull between narcissistic personalities and deeply empathic people.

I know this firsthand. Narcissists can be magnetic. They are often witty, charming, captivating, and intellectually sharp. At first, they may feel energizing, even intoxicating.

But beneath that surface is frequently a pattern of self-absorption, control, and emotional withdrawal when things don’t go their way.

Research suggests that severe narcissism involves a profound lack of empathy, making true emotional reciprocity impossible.

For empaths, this is one of the hardest truths to accept: compassion cannot heal someone who cannot meet you emotionally.

I learned this through experience—more than once—in friendships […]

By Doré Frances|2026-01-18T11:03:35-07:00January 18th, 2026|Dore Frances, Relationships, Why Wisdom Is Harder Than You Think|0 Comments

Whispers To The Soul – Presence Over Excess – Series

The Hunger for More—and the Grace of Enough

We live in a culture that treats more as progress and excess as freedom, yet many of us feel increasingly disconnected from our own lives.

We struggle when we ask more of life than it can give. We try to stand fully in the present while reaching for another place, another moment, another version of ourselves. This desire to have it all often shows up as restlessness—a low hum of dissatisfaction, a fear of missing out.

Yet our limits are not errors in the design. They are part of what it means to be human. When we resist those limits, a subtle sense of lack takes hold. […]

By Doré Frances|2026-01-12T14:43:39-07:00January 12th, 2026|Dore Frances, Relationships, Series, Whispers To The Soul, Why Wisdom Is Harder Than You Think|0 Comments

Beneath My Silence – Why Relationships Fade: Neglect, Trust, and the Power of Effort – Series

Most relationships don’t end all at once ~

they fade over time. They unravel through neglect, selfish choices, unspoken truths, and moments where consideration quietly disappears.

It’s rarely one big event, but rather the accumulation of small omissions: not listening closely, not showing up consistently, not being honest when it matters most.

Relationships ~

whether between friends, colleagues, or partners ~

require intention. When effort becomes optional, and connection stops being a priority, distance naturally grows. Neglect can be just as harmful as outright hurt, leaving people feeling unseen, unvalued, and alone.

Trust depends on honesty and openness. Once truth is compromised, repairing the bond takes real work and willingness from both […]

By Doré Frances|2026-01-11T11:26:31-07:00January 11th, 2026|Beneath My Silence - Poems, Dore Frances, Relationships, Series, Why Wisdom Is Harder Than You Think|0 Comments

Facts vs Truth: Why the Stories We Believe Shape Our Lives

The Stories We Believe

A well-told story invites belief. It doesn’t need to be true—it just needs to sound right. And we are often just as willing to believe the stories we tell ourselves. When we quietly ignore what should give us pause, it becomes remarkably easy to convince ourselves that a questionable choice is a good one.

We do it when we buy things beyond our means, settle into relationships that almost—but not quite—fit, or take financial risks that create long-term stress while promising short-term relief.

In those moments, we aren’t being honest with ourselves, which is why not every thought deserves our trust.

So what can we trust?

If […]

By Doré Frances|2026-01-10T11:21:32-07:00January 10th, 2026|Dore Frances, Relationships, Spirituality, Why Wisdom Is Harder Than You Think|0 Comments